The Essential FLR Toy Kit for Your Drawer

Everything we own fits in one drawer of the dresser, and I keep the key to that too. Don't rush to buy it all at once: things don't create the dynamic, they only underline it. But the right things make it easier — for you and for him. Here is what has stayed with us, in order of importance.

1. Your pleasure: vibrators and dildos

I start here on purpose: the drawer should open with your toys, not his. Everything else — the cage, the whip, the collar — is about him; this is about you, and without it the whole structure loses its point. The more vibrators you own and the more varied they are, the better you know your body: which pace, which spot, how many minutes — and the easier it is to get yours quickly and reliably, without depending on his skill or his mood. A woman who knows exactly how she comes is already a Mistress, even without all the rest.

What is worth having: a clitoral suction toy (Womanizer, Satisfyer) — the fastest and the most reliable; a small finger vibe or a bullet — for what happens in front of him and on him; a curved G-spot vibrator and a rabbit — for long evenings when he kneels and watches; and two or three dildos of different sizes — including for teasing: he holds, he hands over, he watches you enjoy an object rather than him. Separately — a remote-controlled vibrator: the remote in his hand, the commands yours, and it is the only toy he ever touches of his own accord.

And the main thing — their upkeep is entirely his job. He washes them after every use, dries them, charges them, puts them back in their places and knows which one lies where. You don't hunt for a charger and don't check whether a toy is clean: you say "the rabbit" — and ten seconds later it is in your hand, charged and warm from his palm. It is his daily duty, like the dishes, and it is more shaming than the dishes: he takes care of what replaces him.

Use them in front of him — and especially instead of him. He is locked, kneeling by the bed, you with the suction toy — one of the strongest scenes without a single stroke: you get yours, he watches and understands that he is needed to hand it over and put it away. More in the chapter "Your Pleasure at the Centre".

And a strap-on — for you: not only the one you wear, but the one you put on him. He is locked, he can't come and can't be inside you — but the harness goes on over the cage, and in it he enters you again: at the size you chose, for as long as you need, with no chance at all of an orgasm of his own. He works, he sweats, he tries — and gets only your moans and your "enough". Perhaps the most honest sex in a marriage: all the pleasure to you, all the labour to him, and his locked cock rubbing against the cage with every thrust, reminding him who here is for whom.

2. The chastity cage

The one item of his you can't do without — and the one you must not save money on. A cheap one-size cage from a shop chafes, breaks in the second month and, worst of all, he doesn't feel it; within a week the cage turns into a formality. Buy the good one straight away, made to his measurements: the Kink3D Cobra — printed exactly to fit him, weighs next to nothing, built to be worn for weeks without coming off — or a custom titanium cage if you want the weight and the cold of metal. It costs as much as a good pair of boots, and it may be the most sensible purchase of our marriage. If the budget really won't allow it right now — a steel cage in his size, with the understanding that it is temporary.

The ring matters more than the cage: too tight means swelling by morning, too loose means it slips off — and he will use either as a reason to take it off. The lock is an ordinary padlock; the key hangs on a chain around your neck. For travel, where metal is a problem, use numbered plastic seals: you write down the number, he can't remove it unnoticed.

3. Whip, paddle, cane, birch, flogger

They all hit differently, and the difference is the character of the pain, not its strength.